Review

This has been a strange week and it's only Thursday, but I think it is especially weird because it started on Friday.

Reilly had her wisdom teeth out last Friday and I was happy that things went so well for her--other than the fact that the most scary thing to her was the IV needle and they had to try 3 different places to get it started! I was glad I had asked to go in with her for that, she was really scared. But she was a trooper. The surgeon said things had gone really well and she was fine on the ride home, sleepy but fine. We were faithful with the ice and meds but she swelled up huge and bruised pretty bad. Here it is a week later and she still can't eat much but she's doing good. She goes for her post op check tomorrow.

Today was good news, Reilly got a scholarship for next year, it's almost enough to pay tuition for 2 semesters, yeah! She's a good student and it is paying off for her. She is looking for a summer job, she's got to pay for books after all.

Saturday we went to the local parade. Grubstakes. That's what our town celebrates. Payson has onions. Pleasant Grove has strawberries. Yucca Valley has grubstakes. We haven't done the local scene much since moving here and the weird thing was I felt at home, like it was my town. I cheered for the local school band and the preachers telling me I'll go to hell for my incorrect beliefs, and the 4x4 jeep club and the Shriners in their go cart trucks. We saw people we know and people who know us yelled hello across the highway. It was very different, I can't explain exactly how but I guess I realized we belong here. This is all our children really know of home, maybe it's time to embrace our Yucca Valley.

Sunday was actually pretty laid back. No extra meetings a whole day as a family, that was strange but really really nice. Wish that was the way it was.

Monday was also a laid back day and everyone had a good time on their day off. As afternoon rolled around I actually got spontaneous and invited some friends over for dinner. The wind picked up but the kids still swam a little. We cooked inside though and ate around the kitchen table and in the living room. It was relaxing and enjoyable--just so unusual for us.

Tuesday was one of the top 10 worst days of my life. I can't pinpoint why exactly but it laid me flat. I took a friend to the hospital for a treatment, it took all day and some yucky stuff happened and even though I was truly happy to be of service I got too tired, too angry, too hungry, and too sad to handle it. I got home, showered and went to bed at 4:00 in the afternoon, wanting my mom.

I feel anxious. Does that ever happen to you? I feel like I've missed something important but not an appointment or a deadline, or anything small like that, more like I missed medical school--something monumental. So I'm asking myself, Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing in my life? Is it too late to change course if I'm not on the right road? How will I know? And am I willing to do what it takes to make things the way they are supposed to be? These are hard questions and I don't have the answers and I'm not sure I want them either.

Ah well...It's time to make dinner and get the boys ready for their games, it's baseball night and dinner is definitely the right choice right now!